According to recent press reports, Americans are having oral sex at amazingly younger ages-- and with increasing nonchalance. (Note: Oral sex here refers specifically to fellatio.) Foreplay precedes and frequently replaces sexual intercourse because it's perceived to be noncommittal, quick and safe. For some kids it's a cool thing to do; for others it's an inexpensive excitement. Raised in a culture in which speed is valued, kids, not surprisingly, seek pleasure principle through oral sex (the woman by instantly pleasing the boy, the kid by kicking back and delighting in the flight). A seemingly facile command over the sexual landscape of one's partner is accomplished without the encumbrances of clothing, coitus and the rest of the unpleasant company. The blow job is, in essence, the new joystick of teen sexuality.
In other words, if we are to believe today's sociologists and culture mavens, foreplay has ended up being common. But the increased banality of the blow job is bewildering. When I was a teenager, in the bad-taste, disco-fangled '70s, fellatio was something you graduated into. Rooted in the terrific American sport of baseball, the sexual metaphors of my generation put fellatio somewhere after online, method off in the remote plains of the outfield. In reality, skipping all the bases and going straight to fellatio was the sort of home run booked only for racy, borderline lawbreakers, who delighted in a host of licentious and prohibited activities that made them stars in the heavens of teenager recklessness.
The first blow task I ever gave (after methodically searching my method past all the bases) was an act of faith. After lastly figuring out how to manually handle my boyfriend's odd vestigial organ-- how to brandish, control and manage his distended, tumescent pink love shaft-- I now had the complicated job of needing to determine how to manage it orally. Lick? Suck? Use your hands? If only the how-to books that exist today existed back then.
" Put both hands into the L position around the base of the shaft," says "Sex Tips for Straight Women From a Gay Man." "Lick the whole tip and after that use your tongue to lick up and down the sides. Covering your teeth with your lips, and keeping your mouth taut, move the head inside and lick the sensitive area underneath with both the idea and flat part of your tongue ... continue down the shaft as far as you can go in one fell swoop." And on it goes. It consists of pointers on curiosities like cock whipping, hummers and tinglers, plus advice on how to breathe. (Men may fear the cavernous tunnel that leads to the primitive soup of the womb, but females risk death by gagging.).
Plainly even the most extensive bout of coitus pales in contrast with the intimacy of fellatio, at least for the one providing it: nesting one's face in the musty, doughy pelt of your partner's loins; bringing the full force of your tongue, lips, teeth (indeed, your entire face) to bear on the inflamed, supplicant shaft; coaxing the salted swell of seed-bearing spermatozoa growing from deep within the vulnerable, fuzz-laced scrotum; and, finally, partaking in the ultimate exchange of physical fluids. (For what could be more carnal and, well, in your face than swallowing sperm?) All this is much more intricate than the basic act of coitus, where the crucial fits in the ignition and things more or less just happen. Fellatio is difficult labor, in every sense of the word.